Fear

Fear. A single word that holds so much power. One word that can change the way you think, the way you talk, the way you act. Fear is what has always held me back. Fear is what made me question the motives of any person that I've had a relationship with. Fear is what told me to be quiet in the group. Fear is what told me that no matter how hard I try, it will never be enough. Because I have seen what it is like when love goes wrong. I have seen what happens when you speak up when you are not supposed to. I've seen the trials, the struggles, the sleepless nights, the worry, the fear... But that fear was never mine to have. I am not the decisions of my parents or the boy that did me wrong or the group of girls that spoke words that were not true but were fun to spread. I am not the countless people who asked what I was going to do with my life you know "besides this music thing" that will get me no where in "real life". I am not the statistics, the probabilities, the calculations. I am me, and I am stronger than any chance that could be taken into consideration. You see, the only thing we have to fear is fear itself. Without fear, there are no questions. There is success and there is a chance to get better. Fearing the unknown will not make it known. Fearing what could be will not prevent it from happening. I am not in control, God is. I put my trust in Him, knowing that He is greater than any fear that I could ever place upon myself. I need to stop looking back, stop looking forward, and I need to start looking up. It is time to let go and let God. I can only find myself when I learn to accept myself and the place that I am at, knowing that more is to come, but only in God's time.

-Shelb