Choosing You
I am the definition of an over-thinker. I think myself into scenarios that will never happen, give myself anxiety about situations that I am not in, nor will I probably ever be in. I worry about who I will become, what I will do, how my past will affect my future. My mind is always going and recently it has been taking a toll on my mental health. I have been so caught in anything but the present moment that I could see myself starting to become exactly that which I was afraid of becoming. And then I got to thinking... because as you can tell, I tend to do that a lot.... and a new thought came to mind. I choose my decisions each and every day. I choose how I react to a situation, what I will do with my day, which temptations I will fall into or resist. I choose who I am becoming by each little decision that I make. If I decide that today I will go for a run, no one can force me to do otherwise. If it is raining I can go inside to the treadmill, if that treadmill breaks I can run in place; there are multiple challenges that I could possibly face ... but no matter what, I can go for a run today if I tell myself that I am going to do so. The same goes for mental health. I am not here to tell you that you can tell yourself a magical phrase and will instantly feel better. You will have hard days. You will face challenges. You will be broken down, pushed to the side, taken for granted... but if you decide to rise again and take on another day... that is exactly what you will do. If you are worried about becoming the type of person that you saw your family members become, you can choose a different destiny. You will still face the same challenges and temptations, but that is what will make you stronger. Everybody gets angry, but not everyone punches a wall when they feel rage coming upon them. Everyone has their heart broken, but not everyone sets their ex's car on fire (even if we all secretly want to because come on, Taylor Swift had some pretty convincing music videos that suggest doing so will solve all of your problems). The fact of the matter is, your mind is a powerful tool. Your mind is what shapes you into the person you will become. You see, you are not your past. You are not your crazy family. You are not the endless possibilities of what COULD happen. You are the complex design of each and every decision you make. Your mind can take you many places, but you are in control of your mind and you are in charge of those destinations every single day.You are who you choose to become. Choose happiness, choose love, choose strength and selflessness. Choose to be different and to be better than those before you. Choose to break the walls that are before you and tell yourself that you are so much more than what your anxiety worries that you will become. And so, choose you. Choose the you who can take on the world. Choose the you who can move mountains. You are a warrior. Go fight the good fight.
-Shelb